Monday, 2 September 2013

Tyler's Super Amazing Cookies Of Awesomeness

Okay...the honeymoon hasn't been going exactly as I expected.

As honeymoons go, ours probably wasn't going to be the most exciting one anyway, but I'd hoped it'd be a little better than this.   Sini and I decided not to go away right after our wedding because I was still on full-time hours at the store and I'm in the process of getting ready to go back to university, too.   We opted to wait until the Labour Day weekend to travel, and since Sapphire planned to visit her parents that weekend, she offered to let us travel with her.   I love going to the country.  There's plenty of opportunity for outdoor adventure.  Since Sini and I both enjoy the great outdoors, we thought it'd be a nice getaway for us. 

We started off with high hopes.  Sini and I left Skyla and Pax in Rommie's capable hands and we figured that we had nothing to worry about, but I should've known that this trip wouldn't live up to our beautiful expectations when we got onto the ferry to depart Prince Edward Island on Friday afternoon.  Sini said she was feeling great when we left town and she was excited about the trip.  We were both really looking forward to it because Sini has never been here before and I wanted to show her around the village.  Of course, we had plans to do some other things that didn't involve sightseeing and community events, but those haven't come to pass, either.   The ferry crossed the strait in high winds on Friday, and Sini was seasick.  She kept insisting that she'd been on the water dozens of times in her life and she was never seasick before, and maybe that's true, but she certainly didn't cope very well with being on the water this weekend.  

I hoped she'd feel better once we were on dry land again, and she did, but on Saturday morning she felt awful again.  So, not seasickness, then.   Yesterday and today started out pretty much the same.  Every day since we arrived here, Sini hasn't gotten out of bed until noon.

On Saturday, I went with Sapphire to a huge community yard sale.   I wanted to stay with Sini, but she insisted that I should try to have some fun.  I'll admit that I did have fun perusing other people's junk and looking for things that Skyla and Pax might like, but I was still worried about Sini and I was relieved when I finally got back to her.   At the yard sale, we found a desk for Cassie and I discovered a rocking horse that I think the kids are going to love.  Sini thought it was great, too.  It needs some work, but I think it'll be a fun project for us to work on this fall if Sini feels up to it.    Sapphire has photos of our yard sale finds, but she says they're still on her camera, so I'll have to save them for another post.

It rained all day Sunday and I stayed in bed with Sini until lunch time.  In the afternoon, Sapphire convinced me to go with her to the local senior citizens home to visit some people.  I usually love visiting the seniors, but I wasn't really into it this weekend.  I tried to be positive, but I think some of them could tell I wasn't one hundred percent happy.   I was supposed to be there to help brighten their day, but they were the ones who did their best to cheer me up.

It's been raining all day today as well and I was tempted to stay curled up with Sini under our blankets yet again, but Sapphire foiled that plan by coming to the door of our room around half-past seven and informing me that she was doing a charity project and that I should help.   I said that taking care of my wife was my project for the day, but she said I could do that and help her too. Reluctantly, I agreed.

What was Sapphire's project, you ask?  She wanted to make cookies for seniors.  This apparently all came about because nearly every time she's here she makes a special dessert for her father's best friend.  She figured that if she could make something for him, she could make something for other seniors in the community who live alone and might appreciate a treat.  It'd be a good way to bring a smile to somebody's face, she said.

Despite my initial reluctance, I found that I really liked this idea a lot.   I remembered my experience from the day before, and I tried to imagine the older people who would be receiving these cookies.  If I were old and lived alone, I think I'd love to have some friendly visitors and a nice plate of sweets.  I mean, I'd like that now, and I'm neither old nor lonely.  Cookies and friendship just seem to go hand in hand, don't you think?

"I think I'll make my special cookies," I said.

"Which ones are those?" Sapphire asked, as if she didn't know.  I think she just likes to hear me say the name.

I obliged her with, "You know.  My super amazing cookies of awesomeness."

"I think that'll work out great," she said.  "I'll make peanut butter cookies."

Sapphire makes really good peanut butter cookies, just so you know.

"Save me one?"

Sapphire laughed.  "Don't worry.  We're not giving all of them away."

"Awesome," I said.

The cookie flavours having been decided, we got down to business.  Sapphire cranked up the volume on her iPhone and we had some tunes going while we worked.  We were searching the cupboards for our ingredients when Sapphire made a suggestion.

"Tyler," she said. "Do you think your readers would like it if we shared our cookie recipes on your blog?"

"I don't know how many bakers I have in the audience," I said, "but I wouldn't mind sharing the recipe for my cookies.  You never know."

So, that's what the rest of this post is going to be about.

I'll warn you now, this particular recipe makes a lot of cookies.  When I make this recipe, I usually end up with between 65 and 70 cookies, so if you're going to make this, be prepared for the results!   I highly recommend you find the biggest bowl in your kitchen to mix this, because it can get messy with all that flour.  I usually wear an apron when I'm at home, but Sapphire's mother didn't have one that I was comfortable in.  I don't do that whole June Cleaver thing very well, and I wasn't keen on being all decked out in the frilly monstrosities that pass for aprons around here.  I figured my t-shirt and jeans could always be washed.

Anyway, here are the ingredients you're going to need:

2 cups of brown sugar
1 cup of white sugar
1-1/2 cups of shortening
4 eggs
2 teaspoons of coconut flavouring
2 teaspoons of baking soda
1 teaspoon of salt
4 cups of flour
2 cups of dark chocolate chips

You're also going to need a very large bowl, a small bowl, a wooden spoon, measuring cups and spoons, a regular teaspoon, a fork, baking trays, oven mitts or pot holders, and parchment paper.   Optional items for this project include an apron, your CD player or MP3 player (for tunes to sing along with while you're in the kitchen) and a lover, child, sibling or friend (because baking is always more fun with company).

First things first: mix up the ingredients in the order they're listed.   I measure out the two kinds of sugar first, and then I add the shortening.  You need to cream the sugar and shortening together before you start adding other stuff.  If you're anything like me, I had no idea what 'cream together' meant the first time I ever tried to make cookies.  Use your wooden spoon to blend the sugar and shortening together until the whole thing has a nice creamy texture.


Once you've got the sugar and shortening blended, then you can add the eggs and the flavouring.  I always find it best to break my eggs into a small bowl before I add them into the mixture.  Sometimes I accidentally get pieces of shells in there, and I wouldn't want those to end up in my cookies!  For me, this is where the lover, child or friend can be really helpful.   Anyway, once you're satisfied that your eggs are okay, add them to the stuff in the big bowl.   Next, measure out your coconut flavouring and add it to the big bowl too.   If you don't have coconut flavouring at home, you can use vanilla.  The cookies will still taste good.


Next comes the messy part.  Measure out the salt, baking soda and flour and then add them to the mixture in the bowl.   You have to mix it up really well so that you're left with firm dough.   It shouldn't be too sticky, but it shouldn't be dry either.  If your dough feels too wet or sticky, you can add a little more flour.  If it seems too dry and crumbly, you can add just a little bit of water to it.  Be careful not to add too much!  If I have to add water, I do it a tablespoon at a time.

When the dough is at the right consistency, it's time to add the most important part; the chocolate.  For this batch I used a 250-gram packet of dark chocolate chips.  In case you're curious, a 250-gram packet of regular size chocolate chips should equal about 2 cups.   For a fun variation on this, you can use Smarties or M&Ms instead of chocolate chips.  Pax always wants me to make these with Smarties.  I think he likes the rainbow colours.   You can also use white chocolate chips or butterscotch chips.   Xander and Dylan both like them with butterscotch chips.  When I make that variation, I switch the coconut flavouring to rum flavouring (don't tell my mother). 


After the chocolate is mixed in, you get to move on to the next messy part of this operation.  These cookies are rolled by hand.  If you're squeamish about touching the dough with your bare hands, you can wear some of those disposable plastic gloves that the staff at fast-food restaurants wear.  You can buy those at most large supermarket chains.  Dylan is a disposable glove wearer.  Sometimes I wish I could watch him when he does this, because I think it'd be hilarious.  He's my cousin and best guy friend, and I love him, but sometimes I wonder if he might be adopted or something.  He hates not being perfectly clean.   Growing up, when he used to stay with us in the country, he somehow managed to avoid all the dirty chores like mucking out stalls and collecting eggs.   The chores that Michael and I loved were the ones that made Dylan cringe.

But, we were making cookies, so let's get back to that, shall we?

If you're not my cousin Dylan, get your hands in there and start having fun!

Before you get too excited about playing with the dough, though, you should raise the rack in your oven to the highest position and then preheat your oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.  If you can't see, you might need help with this part.  I know I usually do.   Once I've got the oven started, I line my baking trays with parchment paper. You can get parchment paper at the supermarket.  The parchment helps prevent the bottom of the cookies from scorching and, if you aren't using non-stick baking trays, it'll also keep them from sticking to the tray.

Okay, now is when I start rolling the cookies. I roll out balls of dough that are the right size to fit into the bowl of a regular teaspoon. Using the teaspoon helps me know that I'm not making them too big, and it helps me make them roughly the same size as each other.  If they're different sizes, they won't bake at the same rate, and some of them might burn up before the others are done.


Here's a better idea of what I'm talking about:


I always try to make sure the cookies are evenly spaced when I place them on the tray.  I also try not to put them too close together, because these cookies will spread a little while baking.  If you put them too close together, you could end up with one gigantic cookie.  Of course, that isn't necessarily a bad thing.   I've been known to spread the dough over couple of  parchment-covered pizza pans and make some enormous party cookies.  I did that one for Cassie's birthday.  Rommie drizzled chocolate syrup over the top and she cut it like a pizza to serve to Cassie's birthday party guests.   Was I Mister Popularity after that?  You bet.

After the tray is filled with evenly spaced cookie balls, the next thing to do is flatten them.  I use a fork for this, but you can use a spoon or a spatula or even your hand.



 Press the cookies down with the fork so that they look like this.


Usually I find that by the time I get the first tray done, the oven is heated and ready to put the cookies in.   Sapphire says to remind you that every oven is different, so baking time in your oven might not be the same as in ours.  I bake these for 12-14 minutes.  I can usually judge by the smell when they're done.  Also, if I touch the cookie with the tip of my finger, and it's firm to the touch, I know it is done.  If you're going to use that method, be very careful!  Of course, if you can see, you can probably tell when your cookies start to get golden around the edges.   Sapphire told me to tell you that it's safest to look and not touch.

When the cookies are done, I like to cool them on a cooling rack.  If you don't have one, you can leave them to cool on the baking trays or on a glass plate.

They are great with coffee or a cold glass of milk.


We wrapped up most of these to give away, but I insisted that we keep some for Sapphire's parents and grandmother, and of course I set aside a few for Sini.  I'm hoping I can tempt her into eating them later.  Cookies might not be the healthiest food choice for an expectant mother, but at least it'd be something.   Meanwhile, I'm going to enjoy one of these cookies myself.

If you guys make this recipe, I'd love to know how it works out for you.

Catch you later!

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