Beautiful Friendships

I never thought I'd be writing a post about Xander, or at least I never expected to write a post about him that isn't a rant.  Check your watches.  The Earth may have just stood still for a few seconds.

Okay, here comes the subject of this post.  Are you ready?

Xander has a boyfriend.

Before you ask, it isn't Radek.   Xander and Radek like to refer to each other as boyfriends but I think they do it in sort of the same way women refer to their female buddies as girlfriends.  No, this boyfriend is a real boyfriend, an actual love interest as opposed to a bromance.   And where, you're probably curious to know, did Xander meet this wonderful man?   It was not at his school, not on his soccer team and not at his after-school job at the photography studio.

Are you tired of guessing, yet?  Xander met his boyfriend on the internet.   I guess nobody's going to be too surprised by that.   There was some kind of study recently that found one in five romantic relationships nowadays begin online.   Maybe I should tell Xander he's a statistic.

The guy with whom Xander is carrying on this long-distance online relationship is called Remington Arthur Garrett Gray.  We thought poor Beau's real name was a mouthful, but Beau has nothing on this guy.  He does have a manageable nickname, though.  To his friends and family, he's known as Remi.   He's 19 years old and apparently doesn't go to college or university.   According to Xander, he likes playing soccer, swimming, drawing and playing video games.  Xander says he works in retail, and maybe that's true, but when you consider that the guy's AIM screen name is PassTheDutch1992, you have to ask yourself exactly what he might be selling. 

Honestly, I'm trying hard not to be negative about Xander and Remi's relationship.  I really do think it's good that Xander has found someone he likes and who he shares some interests with.   I want him to be happy, even if he is my nemesis.   It's just that I wonder if he fully understands what he's doing, meeting guys on the internet.    I'm concerned over the thought that Remi might not, in actuality, be the person he represents himself to be.   Xander may be 18 years old and a legal adult, but that doesn't negate any of the risks.

I was kind of shocked when I first realized I was experiencing these sentiments about Xander, of all people.  How could I be worried abour Xander, that insufferable pain in the ass kid with whom I've had a thousand petty squabbles?   Then, it occurred to me.  The answer was in the question.   The law might say Xander is an adult, but he's still really a kid, and the parent in me cringes at the thought of any kid putting himself in the way of danger.

Yeah, I know some of you are probably out there saying to yourselves: But, he's only 23, not a whole lot older than Xander, and barely past being a kid himself.   I concede the point that I'm young, but I'm also a father, and believe me, having a child makes you stop being a child pretty quickly.

Before Skyla came along, I did a lot of stupid, reckless and arguably dangerous things too, but now I try to think twice before acting on an impulse.   "It seemed like a good idea at the time," would hardly be sufficient explanation for Sini if I did something dumb that led to me not being around any more to help take care of Skyla and Pax.   Likewise, I'm careful of the things I'll let Pax and Skyla do, because I don't want them to get hurt.   It upsets me when Skyla gets a little scrape or a bruise.  I'd be devastated if anything serious happened to her or Pax, especially if it happened because I was irresponsible.    I guess, to some degree, I feel this sense of responsibility toward all the other kids in the house, too.

Thankfully, I'm not directly responsible for Xander.    That's Rommie's job.   I don't think she likes the idea of her little brother meeting men on the internet.   When he first signed in to this online dating web site, Rommie sat him down and gave him a lecture about internet safety.   She made him promise not to give anyone our address and to show her all the pictures of himself that he plans to share.

Here's one of them, in case you're interested.  Rommie says it's respectable, so I don't mind posting it here.

Xander chats online with Remi a lot.  Sometimes they use Skype, but they mostly seem to do a lot of instant messaging.

Much to Xander's annoyance, both Remi and AIM have become sources of fascination for Pax.   This afternoon, Cassie somehow coerced me into playing tea party with her, Cleo and Skyla, so I was in the living room when Xander came in with his laptop.  Pax came in right behind him, and I heard him say, "Why Xander has computer?"

"I'm going to chat with Remi," Xander said. "We agreed to get online at two o'clock my time.  That's one o'clock for him."

"Why?" Pax said.

"Why, what?"  The sofa's springs creaked as Xander flopped onto it.  A few seconds later, I heard his computer coming to life.  "Why are there different time zones, or why am I chatting with my boyfriend?"

"Why boyfriend?"

"Because he lives far away.  We can't just hang out like normal people," Xander said.  "Dude, why am I telling you this, anyway?  You're not even old enough to shave, much less have a serious boyfriend...or girlfriend, or whatever the hell you do on your planet."

"Boyfriend and girlfriend," Pax said, with some authority.

"Dude," was Xander's eloquent response. "How does that work?"

I'm not sure Pax understood the question.  In any case, he had another question of his own.  "Why Xander not talk to Remi?" 

"Because we're typing.  See?  He just came online and he said, 'hey loverboy'.  Now, I'm going to say something back to him."

I heard Xander typing quickly, and then there was the click of the mouse button.   I have to say, the computer mouse has always been one of life's great mysteries to me.   My computer is equipped with a special kind of screen reading software, and I use the keyboard to navigate.   I've never scrolled or double-clicked in my life, although I consider myself quite proficient with technology nevertheless.

But, I'm getting off track, aren't I?  I was telling you about Xander's boyfriend, although yet again this seems to be turning into a Pax story.    Well, it's still about Xander and it's sort of about Remi too, so bear with me, okay?

I was doing my best to pay attention to the girls and their tea party but, to be honest, I was far more interested in what was happening on the other side of the room.

Pax said, "Remi a real person?"

"Yeah, of course he's a real person," Xander said, and I could tell he was starting to get frustrated.

"Remi real, why I not see him?" Pax wanted to know.

"Because he lives in Jamaica.  Anyway, I've seen him and talked to him.  I know what he looks like.  Trust me, he's real."

"I has friend Xander not see.  Her name Ki," Pax said.  He pronounced the name key, like the thing you insert in a lock.  "I talk to Ki."

"I guess you don't get to talk  now," Xander said.  "She's still on your planet, right?"

In response to that, Pax said the most surprising thing.  "No.  Ki here."  

'Yeah, right.  Whatever."

That was the point at which I felt it was necessary for me to intervene.  It was obvious Xander was losing patience, and I didn't want him to snap at Pax.  It's pretty upsetting for Pax when people scold him, and it seems to me that he's still not entirely trusting of Xander. 

"Pax, come over here, please," I said.  "Let Xander chat with his friend.  You can play with us."

"Okay," Pax said, and obediently crossed the room.  He sat down on the floor beside me, but it was pretty apparent that he wasn't interested in playing tea party.  "Tyler, this girl game." 

"I know," I said.  "What can I say?  Cassie talked me into it."

"Play different game."

"This is what we're playing now," Cassie said.

"Since this s a girl game, maybe your friend Ki would like to play," I suggested to Pax,  curious to know what his reaction would be.   I had a hunch about his friend, but I wanted him to tell me more about her before I jumped to any conclusions. 

He sounded genuinely surprised.  "Tyler see Ki?"
 
I laughed.  Pax often forgets that I can't see.  "No, buddy.  Maybe you can tell me what she looks like."

"Ki green.  Ki hair white.  She like climbing and--" something in Erisan-- "and she like socks." 

"She sounds very nice," I said. "Are you the only one who can see her?"

"Piri say he see her."

"You don't think your father could really see her?"

"I say talk to Ki.  Piri talk, but he not look at Ki." 

"And Ki is here right now?" I said.  "She came with you from your ship?"

"Ki always with Pax," he said.

Yes, I thought, Ki is Pax's imaginary friend!  Figuring out this bit of information actually explained quite a lot.  For instance, I often hear him chattering away to himself in Erisan while he's playing with his toys, and sometimes I hear him whispering at night when he's in bed.  I finally understood, and it became perfectly obvious that he's talking to Ki.   Knowing about Pax's imaginary friend, his occasional insistence that a certain chair at the table be left empty suddenly made sense too.  Ki must've been sitting there, and it wouldn't do for one of us to sit on her.  

Ki's existence also explains why Pax doesn't seem to believe that Remi is a real person.   Xander is the only one who talks to Remi, and no one else has seen him.  I'm sure in Pax's mind, it's utterly logical to assume that Remi is just as invisible and mysterious as Ki. 

The secret world of imaginary friends is really unknown to me.  I didn't have one as a child but, then again, I'm a twin.   Michael and I have been practically inseparable our whole lives.  We never needed imaginary friends because we always had each other.   I must remember to ask Sini and Rommie if either of them had an imaginary friend.   Sini probably did.    When I try to picture Sini as a child, I always think of her as a whimsical little girl with a vivid imagination. 

I said to Pax, "Can I meet Ki?"

"Yes," Pax said, and then he said something in his own language.  He explained, "Ki not talk English."

"I understand," I said.  "Tell her that I'm very pleased to meet her."

He said something else in Erisan and then asked, "Ki touch Tyler?"

"Of course she can," I said, and held out my hands.  "Only my hands and arms, please, Ki.  It isn't nice to touch humans everywhere."

"She know."  

I let myself be 'touched' by Pax's imaginary friend for several seconds before lowering my arms again.  Deciding to play along for a bit, I said, "I think she touched my hair."

"She say Tyler hair special," Pax said.  "Erisan not has..."

He must have been making a gesture, because Cassie piped up with "Curly!"

"Curly," Pax repeated.

"My hair is curly, too," Cassie said.  "Ki can touch my hair if she wants."  

Bless Cassie and her ten-year-old imagination.  With it, she'd created a win-win situation.   All at once, Skyla and Cleo also wanted to 'meet' Ki, and we started a new game which saved me from any further embarrassment at having been a tea party participant and which seemed to go a long way in making Pax feel comfortable and accepted.

I don't think our game did much to improve my chances of convincing Pax that Xander's boyfriend is an actual human being, but I'm not particularly worried about it.   No one's happiness hinges on whether my little alien boy believes Remi is real or not.  

Later, Cassie took Pax out to play in the yard while I put Skyla down for her afternoon nap.  Pax said he was going to climb trees.  I warned him to be careful.  Cassie said she'd watch him, and promised that she wouldn't let him climb too high. 

It took a while for Skyla to settle down.   Sometimes she resists going to sleep, even though she's clearly tired.  I sang to her and rocked her in my arms for a long time before she finally drifted off.

With Skyla asleep at last, I left the room as quietly as I could.   My mind must've been wandering or something, because I wasn't paying attention and nearly collided with somebody in the hall outside my room.    I was startled when the person put out a hand to steady me.

"Careful," said Xander's voice, far too close for my comfort.

I almost told him not to touch me, but thought better of it, and instead said, "Thanks."

"What are you doing?"

"I just put Skyla in bed.  What are you doing?"

I might've sounded defensive, but I'm always a little wary of Xander.  Usually, when he's this near to me, I end up wearing a sign with a rude slogan or feeling an ice cube slithering down my back inside my shirt.

"Uh...nothing," Xander said, and there was something unusual in the tone of his voice. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

I told myself to relax.  If he was going to do anything to me, he'd have done it by now.   "Sure," I said. "What do you want to talk about?"

"About earlier.," he said.  "I just wanted to say thanks, you know, for getting Pax to leave me alone when I was on the computer."

"I did it for him as much as for you," I said.

"Yeah, well..." I could hear him shuffling his feet.  "I also wanted to say I think it's pretty awesome, the way you take care of him.   You're a really good dad."

Was that a compliment comng from Xander?  I think I was momentarily shocked into silence.  After a few seconds, when I recovered my composure and found my voice, I managed, "Thank you, Xander."

"My dad died when I was twelve," he said, further surprising me with his candor.

"I'm sorry."

"I didn't really know him.  He was busy with his work, and he never spent much time with us," Xander said.  "Skyla and Pax are lucky.  I can't remember my dad ever playing games and stuff with us, pretending to see our imaginary friends and all that.   I had one, you know.  An imaginary friend."

"Really?"

"His name was Bob.  I was afraid to tell my dad about Bob, because he'd probably think it was stupid to have an invisible friend."

"It's not stupid," I said.  "It's part of growing up."

"Yeah," Xander said.  He was silent for a while, and then I heard, "'Tyler?"

"Yeah."

"I just want you to know, if I ever have a kid, I hope I can be a good dad like you." 

Something unspoken happened between me and Xander during that conversation; something that transcended the words we were saying to each other.   I began to understand Xander in a way I never did before, and I think he began to respect me in a way he'd never done before.  I don't know if Xander and I will ever be close, but maybe - just maybe  - today marked the fragile new beginning of a friendship. 

I guess the take away piece from today's events is that friends really do come in all shapes, sizes and colours, and they often appear when and where you least expect them.  No matter how you find them, though,  a good friend is always a blessing. 
     

Internet Shopping And The Joy Of Socks

As you can probably guess, I don't do a whole lot of online shopping.    Being blind is not particularly conducive to a method of commerce where the only way to know what you're buying is to look at pictures of it.  Now, I can't say that I never buy stuff on the internet, because I like to buy books in Braille that I can't find around here.  Then there's iTunes.  I buy way more music and audiobooks from iTunes than my budget can tolerate sometimes.   Part-time wages, why can't you support my family, my education and my iTunes habit too?   And, as Sapphire so lovingly reminded me the last time she caught me buying audiobooks, "Tyler, I hope you know online shopping isn't what your student loan is for."

Really?  I had to find this out just when John Le Carré released a new novel?

At least I can say honestly that I'm not using my loan money to buy adult beverages.  Yeah, you, the guy with no partner or kids.  You know who you are. Maybe I should tell Sapphire about that, and then we'll see who gets the lecture about what student loans are for. 

Well, the student loan money for this school year is pretty much gone, anyway.  With school over for the year (and graduation coming up in two weeks!) I'll be getting more hours at the music store, so at least there's that.   My manager says I can have full-time hours this summer, but I'll have to go back to part time in the fall.   That's okay with me since I'll be starting law school in September.  But, that's a subject for another post.

I'm talking about online shopping in this post.  In particular, I mean the kind of shopping that used to be carried on in malls, the kind that girls like to do.  I'm talking about the kind of shopping where you just wander around and look at stuff until you find something that you think you absolutely must have.  I like to call it the 'I'll know it when I see it' approach.

My sister-in-law Rommie is addicted to online shopping, which would be perfectly fine if she wasn't a stay-home mum with two little kids and a husband who goes to school and works part-time.  I'm sure Sapphire has given her the talk about what Michael's student loan money is supposed to be used for, but I guess the message didn't get through.  Rommie can literally sit there for hours and browse web sites for clothes, shoes, jewelry, stuff for the kids, stuff for the kitchen, craft supplies, soap, towels, you name it.  The list goes on and on.  It's amazing, the things this woman will buy online.   We all decided that Rommie's internet shopping habit had reached an all time high on the crazy-o-meter when she bought underpants for Michael from some online men's designer clothing store.   Dylan and I teased him for weeks about his 'cyber shorts'.  We made ourselves pretty unpopular with that, I must say. 

Rommie's online shopping isn't limited to things for herself, Michael, Jack and Cleo.   She often  helps her sister and brother pick out clothes.  While Cassie seems to like electronic window shopping with her big sister, I'm not sure Xander appreciates Rommie's fashion advice all that much.   Apparently she has good taste, though.  I got quite a few compliments today on my new shirt, which I bought online with Rommie's help.

Sini doesn't like my new shirt.  She says it's dull.   I think her disapproval has more to do with Rommie helping me pick it out and less with any actual dislike of it on her part, though.   If I haven't mentioned it before, Sini can be extremely jealous.   Sometimes her possessiveness can be kind of cute, but most times it just makes things awkward.

Of course, this situation may have been made worse by Rommie's comment about the shirt Sini thought I should get: "Would you really let your man go out in public wearing a bright purple shirt?"   For someone like Sini who comes from a culture where going out in public while wearing any kind of clothing is a big deal, I have no trouble figuring out why she was offended.  Also, purple is one of Sini's favourite colours.

 For the record, I would've worn the purple shirt.   As long as my clothes are comfortable and fit me well, colour really isn't an issue for me.

Since I'm on the subject of clothing and colours,  I have to share a Pax story with you guys.   I hope you don't think I'm turning into one of those annoying people who tell about every single thing their kid does because it's just so adorable.   Believe me, Pax does a lot of things that are not cute and definitely not for sharing with an audience.  I think you'll appreciate this one, though. 

For the past few days, Pax has been fascinated by socks and stockings, of all things.  A few days ago when he was 'helping' Sini and Hunter do the the laundry, he discovered this mysterious layer of human clothing.   Sini said she was losing patience with all his questions, especially since she couldn't answer most of them.   When I got home from work she and Pax both pounced on me and demanded my attention.  With Sini acting as translator, I told my adopted alien child everything I knew about hosiery.   Conversations like that should probably be in the category of stuff you never thought you'd say until you started living with people from another planet.  

Anyway, our little Pax became consumed with the idea of covering his feet with something other than the shoes he frequently liberates from my closet.  On Thursday morning, when I was getting ready to go to work, he came into our room.  I could tell he was up to something, even without the advantage of being able to see him.   I didn't say anything.  I just let him sneak his way across the room until he was beside me. 

"Hi," he said.

"Hi, Pax.  What are you doing?"

"Nothing."  He seems to have learned that response and its connotation fairly quickly

"Really?" I said.  "Sounds to me like you're doing something."

There was a long pause and then a puzzled, "Tyler feel me thinking?"

I laughed at that.  "No, buddy.  You know I can't feel what you're thinking.  Only Sini can feel what you're thinking.   I could tell by the way you were walking."

"Tyler magic," he said.

"No, Tyler is observant," I said.  "Do you need help with something?"

 "I can has?"

"Can I have," I corrected him. "What do you want to have?"

"This."  He lifted my hand and dropped something onto my palm. "Can I have?"

I felt the object he'd placed in my hand, and it took a lot of self-restraint to keep myself from laughing again.  "Pax, whose socks are these?"

He didn't answer me right away, but at last he said meekly. "Michael."

"Did you take them from Michael and Rommie's room?"

"Yes."

"And did you have permission?"

"What means permission?"

"Did Michael say it was okay for you to take these?"

"Michael not say okay.  Michael not there."

Right, because Michael had to go in early to help do the inventory at the bookshop where he works.   I said to Pax, "I'll tell you what.  Why don't you put those socks back where you found them?  If you want socks, we can get you some socks of your own."

"Okay," he said, and scampered off.

At breakfast, I approached Rommie with the subject of getting some socks for Pax.   Our resident power shopper thought it was a fabulous idea, and offered to go to the mall later that morning if Sini wouldn't mind watching Cleo and Jack for a couple of hours.   Sini, who has probably never worn socks in her entire life, was genuinely perplexed and wanted to know why Pax wanted them.

"It is not normal." was her distressed pronouncement. 

"Humans wear," Pax informed her. "I like."

"What colour would you like your socks to be, Pax?" Rommie asked.

"Pink," he said.

Pax is still working on learning the names of colours, so Rommie's reaction was understandable.  "Pink?  Are you sure?"

"Rommie socks pink."

"Yes, they are," she said, laughing.  "I'm wearing pink socks.  You want socks like mine?"

"Yes!  Can has pink?"

"Pax, try that again," I said.  "Try to ask for things the way we taught you."

"Okay."  He jumped up from his chair and came around to my side of the table.  He clutched my hands and said earnestly, "I can has pink socks, please?" 

With that, it was settled.  Pax was going to get socks of his own which, for him, was a major life event.   I went off to work with a smile on my face.   Actually, every time I thought about Pax that day, I grinned.   My boss must've thought I was losing my mind, because when he asked me why I looked like the cat who ate the cream, I told him that my kid was getting his first pair of socks today.

"I thought your kid was a girl," he said.

Yeah.  You know that awkward moment when you realize you can't explain that your other kid is an alien without sounding like a crazy person?  That was it.   I mumbled something about it being a slip of the tongue, and then walked away.  Fortunately, a customer came in just then, wanting someone to show him an affordable guitar for his teenaged son, so I had an excuse not to talk to my boss any more for a while.   I was busy with the customer and my boss seemed to forget about my child's apparent gender-identity issue. 

Dylan and Beau met me after work, and the three of us walked home together.   As we came through the front door, I could hear Pax running to greet us.  He was shouting at the top of his voice, "Tyler! Tyler!"

"Use your inside voice, Pax!" I called out.

Beside me, Dylan had started laughing, and Beau said softly, "Oh, lord..."

"What?" I said.

"Uh..." was all Beau seemed to be able to manage.

A second later, I knew what.  Pax launched himself at me and nearly knocked me over in the process.  Instinctively, I put my arms around him to try and stop his forward motion, and that's when I realized why my cousin was laughing so hard and why poor Beau was so tongue-tied.

"Pax, where are your clothes?"  I blurted.

"I wear clothes, Tyler.  I wear socks!" he said.

Nothing but socks, apparently.   

"Come on," I said.  "Let's get you dressed. You know the rules."

"Sini say okay," he said, and then added proudly. "Sini say permission."   

"Sini is outvoted on this one," I said, and hustled him off to our room for some jeans and a t-shirt, something suitable to be photographed in.  It was inevitable that Sapphire would want to take a picture of him in his new socks, after all.

Since Thursday night, Pax has been going around telling everyone in the house who'll stay still long enough to listen,  "I happy.  I has socks."

I think this world would be a truly perfect place if only the key to everyone's happiness could be as simple as a new pair of socks.

Life With Kids

The good news is, we survived the Victoria Day long weekend, even if we're all a little ragged around the edges.   It wouldn't have been quite so bad if the weather had been better and we could've gone outside to play but, as it was, we had to entertain ourselves and the kids indoors.   Radek and Cassie are pretty good at keeping themselves occupied, but the rest of us had our hands full with the little ones and Pax.   Toddlers are a full-time job at the best of times, and Pax... Well, he's a law unto himself. 

I think Sini and I have more or less adopted Pax, or maybe he's adopted us.  While just about everyone in the house helps take care of him and educate him, he seems to prefer the two of us.  He doesn't like Xander at all and is still a little wary of Hunter, but he's fine with everyone else.  It's Sini or me that he comes to when he's scared or confused, though, or when he wants something.   I thought Pax would be like a little brother to me, but he's more of a challenge than I expected.  Having Pax around is really more like having a second child; a gangly, overgrown child who competes with my daughter for my attention and who likes to steal my shoes. 

Pax also likes playing dress-up.  Sapphire caught him at this:

Skyla and Pax both learned new skills this weekend.   Skyla can now sing the entire alphabet song.  Since we've been helping Pax learn English, I've been trying to teach him the alphabet, and I thought it would be good for Skyla to join in as well.   She still can't really identify the letters, but I love hearing her little voice chirping the song.    By Monday evening, Pax also knew the song.   He recognizes all the letters, and he's even trying to write simple words.  I like using the fridge magnets to teach him because I can touch them and 'see' the words he's trying to spell.  

I remember Michael and me learning the alphabet with fridge magnets when we were kids.   Our parents actually ended up having to buy two sets of them for us because each set only had one of each letter, and Michael and I quarreled over the fact that we couldn't both spell our names at the same time.  (We both needed the L and the E).    Fortunately, we haven't got that problem here, since the only one spelling his name on the fridge is Pax.  I suspect, though, that when Skyla, Jack and Cleo get older we're going to need another set of letters.  

Along with tackling the English language, Pax is learning how to behave among humans.  They must've had some rules for him in the place he was living before, because he certainly understands the meaning of the word no, but I'm not sure those people ever attempted to communicate why certain things were inappropriate or dangerous.   I get the feeling there must've been consequences for bad behaviour at Pax's old house, though.   Michael scolded him for something on Saturday, and he started whimpering.   The same thing happened on Sunday afternoon when I reminded him not to leave his toys out where I might trip on them.  He began crying and saying, "I sorry!" over and over.   Sini came running into the room because she said she could feel Pax's panic so intensely that she thought something bad must've happened.   When Sini realized what was going on, she explained to Pax that he wasn't in trouble, but it took him quite a while to calm down. 

Situations like that really bring to light for me the fact that Pax is essentially a little kid.   His body might be nearly adult-sized, but his mind has some catching up to do.   According to Sini's best calculations, Pax is about sixteen 'Earth years' old, but his level of mental and emotional maturity is nowhere near the level of a human of that age.  Sini says his development is normal by the standards of their world.   Erisans have a long childhood. Lucky them.

More proof that Pax is still a child came in the form of his protest over sleeping apart from Sini and me.    In the beginning, he actually wanted to sleep with us, but I said there was no way that was going to happen.   To my great astonishment, Sini was extremely upset about that.  Apparently,  when Pax first arrived, Sini had been letting him sleep with her.  The only reason he didn't crawl into bed with us on my first night back from my trip to the States was that Sini knew I'd be tired and she didn't want to spring any surprises on me.   The next night, however, the surprise was well and truly sprung.  When I demanded to know why in hell she'd been letting Pax sleep with her in the first place, she said most Erisan children sleep with their parents.   I had a whole list of reasons why Pax sleeping with us was definitely not a good thing.   Sini thought I was being totally unreasonable..

"We're not his parents," I said. 

"That is not the point," said my partner, "and you know it."

"Sini, we don't let Skyla sleep with us, and she's our own child.  If Skyla doesn't sleep with us, why should Pax?" 

"Skyla is half human," she said, as if that was a sufficient answer. 

Her tone sounded so accusatory that I was offended by it on behalf of my daughter and humanity in general.   Of course, that had to be one of those times when my emotion was strong enough for Sini to feel, which only complicated things further because I couldn't deny it or hide it from her.   She couldn't understand why her pointing out the simple truth of Skyla's origin should make me so angry.  Oh, and how dare I be annoyed with her for wanting to do the right thing for our Erisan adoptee?  For those of you who might've been under the impression that Sini and I never fight, this is the point at which I dispel that notion.   We argued over this issue, and it was not pleasant.

In the end we came to a compromise and let Pax sleep in our room.  He curled up on a bunch of pillows on the floor for the first week, until Sapphire got him a bed of his own.   It's a little cramped in our bedroom now, but not nearly as uncomfortable as it would be if we were all sharing the same bed.   

Neither Pax nor Sini is entirely happy with the arrangement.  I guess it shouldn't have come as a shock to me that little Skyla isn't thrilled about it either.    She's been really fussy and clingy lately.   Sini says she's jealous, but I didn't need the benefit of her empathic ability to know that.  I don't think Skyla likes sharing us with Pax.  

My favourite girls, just because in the interests of fairness I can't make this all about Pax:

 In case you're thinking this post is totally about my kids,  I've got a bit more to share about my brother and sister-in-law's kids too.   Now, I'm almost positive that Rommie and Michael are having another baby.   Michael was digging around in the attic this afternoon, and when I asked him what he'd been looking for up there, he said he was looking for Jack's or Cleo's basket. 

"Why would you be looking for a baby basket?" I said, trying to sound nonchalant

"Nostalgia," he said, and then tried to change the subject.  "Are you all packed and ready to go to that conference with Sapphire next week?" 

"Fine," I said. "Don't tell me, but I think it's becoming fairly obvious."

"Really?" Michael said. 

And with that, I'm pretty sure my suspicions have been confirmed. 
 

The Post Wherein Mister Brightman Doth Protest Too Much

Our surprise present that Sapphire bought in Moncton arrived this past Tuesday.  I would've told you guys about it sooner, but I haven't been feeling very well.  Sapphire's been pretty busy with work too, so she wouldn't have had time to help me with the pictures, even if I had felt up to getting on the computer.

There's nothing good about being sick, but I've been getting lots of cuddles from Skyla and Sini, and that's a definite silver lining.  Unfortunately, Pax wants to cuddle too, which is just plain weird.   I wish he could read my emotions as well as he can read Sini's and Skyla's, because then I wouldn't have to tell him that I'm totally not okay with that.

Anyway, on to showing off our present.   Rommie, our answer to June Cleaver, was pretty thrilled with it.   Everyone was pleased, really, and I was gratified that they all liked the gift I helped pick out for them.

 

Sapphire wanted to show our new table and chairs to her online friends and, of course, she insisted that someone should pose for a photo with it.  For some reason, she really seems to enjoy taking pictures of us.  Sometimes it's annoying.   Last Tuesday, it was extremely annoying because when she suggested this photo session, Rommie made me get out of bed for it (regardless of Sini's attempts to intervene, I might add).   To make matters worse, Xander was in on the photo session and made a major nuisance of himself.  

In the end, I think Sapphire must've felt sorry for me.  She let me have first choice of the ice cream bars she'd bought.  Then, Sini and I curled up on the couch while she watched some kind of foreign movie.  She offered to read the subtitles to me, but I wasn't into it.    I like documentaries, crime drama, and the occasional romantic comedy.   Foreign films, not so much.   Sini wrapped me in a blanket and I fell asleep more or less sprawled across her lap.   Yeah, I know what you're probably thinking.  You're completely spoiled, Brightman.    Hey, can I help it if the lady adores me?

By Friday I was feeling better, and I really wanted to go outside.   I wanted to go riding and I wanted to take Skyla out to play in the yard.    I didn't get to do any of that, though, because the weather has taken a turn for the worse.  It rained all day on Friday, and it was so cold yesterday that there were actually a few snow flurries.   Today, the sun is shining but Sini says it's still too chilly for Skyla and me to go out.   Welcome to life on Prince Edward Island!

Apparently it was okay for Rommie and Michael to go outside, though.   The last I heard from them this afternoon, they were whispering to each other and laughing as they headed out the back door.  

I'm sure by now you think I'm just going to spend this entire post whining and complaining, right?  Okay, I'll admit that's pretty much what I've been doing up to this point, but I actually do have a couple bits of good news.   The first one is that I'm going on another trip!  This time, Sapphire says we're going to stay in a really nice hotel.  I've stayed in a few motels before, but they're not very impressive.   This place will have internet access and room service, and maybe a mint on the pillow.   Sapphire is travelling for work and she'll be in boring meetings all day long, but I'm sure we'll have fun afterwards.   I've been hinting that it'd be nice if Sini and Skyla could come with us too, but so far, I don't think Sapphire has gotten the message.  I might have to be more direct.  

My second bit of news is something I'm pretty sure I'm not even supposed to know, much less share with the entire internet, but I'm a little too excited about this to keep it a secret.   I think Rommie and Michael might be expecting again!   I'm not one hundred percent certain of it, but I did happen to overhear them talking about making room for a new family member.  I don't think Sapphire has invited anyone to come and live with us, so unless we have another unexpected arrival like Beau and Pax, I don't know who else they could've meant but a new baby.   Rommie has been acting kind of strange lately, too.   Usually she's up before the rest of us, but ever since Michael and I came back from our trip down south, I've noticed that she stays in bed most mornings and lets Sini or Dylan fix breakfast for us.   I want to ask Michael what's going on, but if I say anything, then he'll know that I know, and that could turn out to be awkward.   

I promise, I'll keep you guys in the loop. 

Suddenly, It's Spring

This post isn't really about anything.  Sapphire just wants to share some pictures and apparently she thinks my blog is her photo gallery.   I'm supposed to comment on photos I can't see?  Brilliant.   She needs to get her own blog.

So, I'm going to talk about the weather, if you don't mind.  

I think winter is finally over at last. We've been having unusually cold weather so far this year, and although it's technically spring, the temperatures haven`t felt like that.   This weekend, though,  the weather showed some dramatic improvement.  It was actually warm enough to wear shorts.

Rommie and Michael brought their kids out to play.  They decided to take a family picture first,  though, before Cleo and Jack got too many grass stains on their clothes.   I think this might be the first time I've posted a picture of my niece and nephew.   My apologies for not showing them to you before.

 

I wasn't particularly worried about grass stains.  Part of the fun in playing outside is crawling around in the grass, looking for interesting things. 

Another thing I like about warm weather is that we get to eat ice cream.   Pax had his first ice cream cone this weekend, which he loved.  None of us were surprised by that, really.  The kid has an insatiable sweet tooth.   He wanted to try every flavour Sapphire had in the freezer, and decided in the end that his favourite is chocolate.  I'm a plain vanilla kind of guy, myself.

 

Oh, and since it's Mother's Day, happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there!

Ego Trip

This past weekend, Sapphire and I went to Moncton.   I packed my bag by myself, even though Sini and Rommie both insisted I needed their help.  It's not like I've never packed to travel before, but I think they might've been a little anxious about my leaving on another adventure so soon after getting back from the USA.   Skyla wanted to help me pack, too.  She thought I should bring my bear, Louis Braille.   I don't usually take Louis out in public.   In fact, I don't usually admit to people outside the house that Louis even exists, but I guess the secret's out now.

I guess there are worse things for a guy to own than a teddy bear, right?

Sapphire and I had to travel on the bus to get to Moncton.   I like the bus.  You can meet a lot of interesting people.  Sapphire took some pictures of wind turbines on the wind farm we passed, but she said the photos didn't turn out all that well, as she shot them through the window of a speeding bus.   I had to ask her to explain what a 'wind farm' is.   She said it's a big field with a lot of turbines that produce energy to make electricity.     It sounds pretty cool to me.  I wish Sini could have been with us to see that.  I think she'd approve.

But, I'm kind of getting off track here, aren't I?    You're probably wondering why I decided to title this post "Ego Trip" and what that - or wind farms -  have to do with going to Moncton.   The wind farm actually has nothing to do with it.  I just thought it was interesting.   The title of this post, though, has everything to do with Moncton, at least for me. 

The purpose for going there was to attend a convention, and the whole thing was a real boost for my ego.   We met a lot of people there, and I lost count of the number of times I heard, "Oh, you're handsome!" or some equally pleasant variation.   By the end of the day,  I was practically overflowing with all the praise.   I'd never been admired by so many people all at once.  It felt awesome.    I don't think I'd like to be praised like that all the time, but once in a while, a big dose of adoration can be good.  It does amazing things for the self esteem.

Sapphire bought a present for everyone at home, and I helped pick it out.    It was too big for us to take on the bus, but the lady we got it from said that she'd send it to us.   It's a surprise for everybody at home, so I won't tell you what it is yet, just in case one of them reads this.  I'll show it to you when it arrives.

Afterwards, we got back on the bus for the two-hour ride to where Sapphire's brother lives.  We stayed at his house for the rest of the weekend (where I was admired some more by Sapphire's brother and sister-in-law).    Sapphire and her brother and sister-in-law stayed up for a while and talked, but I was really tired.  I crashed on the sofa bed in the den.

At Sapphire's brother's house, we had a barbecue, went to the park, and played a funny practical joke on Sapphire's sister-in-law.   I also found out what Sapphire's getting for her birthday.  I can't tell you, because that's a surprise, too.

On Monday morning, we headed for home.  Sapphire's sister-in-law drove us to the bus station, and we said goodbye.   I hope we can visit there again soon.

Little Green Men

The other day I told you that our household got two new arrivals while Michael and I were away, but I only introduced you to one of them.   Now, I'm going to tell you about the second one.  You'll have to suspend your disbelief again, I'm afraid, because our second new roommate is out of this world, literally.   Bear with me, because this is going to take some explaining.

I've shared a lot of things with you about Sini's people, but I don't think I've ever told you about the Erisan sixth sense.   Along with the usual five senses of hearing, touch, taste, smell and sight, Erisans have a non-physical sense; a kind of special mental ability.  They're empathic, which means they can sense each other's feelings and emotions.  They're not telepaths, so they can't read minds or have conversations with each other inside their heads or anything spooky like that, but they know when somebody is jealous, scared, scornful, overjoyed or depressed, or pretty much any other mental state you could think of.    Sini says the crime rate is incredibly low on Eris, and I think this is probably because it's impossible to lie, cheat or be sneaky when everybody near you would know you were up to something.

Sini told me once that she thinks the empathic ability only works reliably between Erisans, as she can't sense what most Earth people are feeling.  She can sense me if I'm feeling a strong emotion.   She says she can often read Skyla's emotions too, but we don't know if this is because Skyla is half Erisan or because all mothers just seem to understand what's going on inside their child's head.   We won't know for a while yet if Skyla will be able to sense Sini's emotions, since the empathic ability doesn't show up until a person starts to mature physically.   In Earth people, that'd be around eleven or twelve years old, but Erisans mature later than we do.  They don't start changing until they're around sixteen or seventeen.

Now I've explained that, the rest of this story should make a little more sense to you.   Remember how I told you about Sini crash-landing in her escape pod in our back yard?  For the longest time, she thought she was the only survivor from her starship who'd ended up here on Earth, and that maybe she was the only survivor, period.   As it turns out, Sini wasn't the only one who crash-landed in somebody's back yard.

For about a week before Michael and I went south, I'd been noticing that Sini was acting strange.  She seemed moody and restless and generally unwell, kind of like the way she was in the early part of her pregnancy with Skyla.   I don't think I need to tell you that I got a little scared at the idea of us having another baby.   When I asked Sini about it, she told me not to worry.  We weren't expecting another child.  

While that was good news in my opinion, I was still worried about Sini's state of mind.  She told me that she was having unusual feelings, which didn't really enlighten me at all, since that much was already obvious from the way she was acting.   When I asked her to tell me more about it, she said that she felt like she wasn't alone, like someone from her world was near.  Of course that had to be impossible, she said, so the only other alternative was that she was losing her mind.

"How do you know it's impossible?" I said.  "Maybe somebody finally figured out where you are, and they sent a ship to rescue you."

"I do not need to be rescued now," she said.  "This is my home.  I live here with you."

"Yeah, but the people on your planet don't know that, do they?"

"No," she conceded.  "If it is a ship from my world, what should I do?"

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

"I want to stay with you and Skyla."

I smiled at that.  "If that's what you want, then that's what you should do.   If you tell them, they'll understand, won't they?"

"I do not know." 

"Well, if they don't want you to stay here, maybe me and Skyla could come with you instead."

"You would really leave everything?  For me?"

"You are everything, Sini," I said. 

I hadn't meant to make her cry but, the next thing I knew, she was wrapped around me in an embrace so fierce that it was almost painful, and she was sobbing against my chest.  I stroked her hair and tried to calm her.    She settled down eventually, but I still held her because she didn't seem ready for us to break contact.   While I sat there, I did some serious thinking about what I'd said to her.  Would I really leave everything I'd ever known?   Chances are, if I did leave, I'd never be able to come back.  How would I manage in a completely alien environment where I was the only one of my kind?

Then, I realized that's exactly what Sini has been doing all this time.  She's living in a place where everything is different from what she grew up with, and where there's no one else like her; yet, she said she wanted to stay.   Even with the possibility of going home, she said she was willing to remain here.  For me.   

With the full impact of that realization, I started to cry. 

"Tyler?"

"I love you," I said, only managing to whisper it.

She brushed some of the tears off my face with her soft, cool fingertips.  "I know," she said softly.  "I feel it.  It is very strong."

That did it.   I'd only been crying a little before, but when I heard those words it was like somebody opened a floodgate.  I can't even begin to describe what it was like for me to hear Sini tell me that she knows I love her without my having to say so. 

After that, we didn't talk about the other Erisans for a while.  Things kind of went along, status quo, until the night before Michael and I were supposed to leave.

"He is very close," Sini said to me.  We were lying in bed and I was half asleep, so I wasn't quite sure if I'd heard her correctly.

"Who?" I said.

"The Erisan," she said. "I am sure there is only one, and he is very near."   

 "If he comes to rescue you while I'm away, don't leave without me, okay?"

"I never wish to be parted from the other half of my soul," she said.

I love this woman to the moon and back.   Maybe more.  Maybe to Eris and back.

You guys already know how my brother and I got along on our trip, so I'm sure I don't need to repeat any of the details of that.   Anyway, the Erisan did arrive while I was gone, but he definitely didn't come to rescue Sini.   He was in pretty desperate need of rescuing, himself.   I already mentioned that Michael and I got home at night, so I didn't get to meet Beau or our new Erisan friend until the next day.

In the morning, when I dragged myself out of bed and stumbled my way to the kitchen for the biggest cup of coffee I could get my hands on,  Sini was there waiting for me.   She greeted me with enthusiastic kisses, and lots of touching in all kinds of unmentionable places.  I wouldn't have let her do that if I'd realized we had an audience. 

Once she was done kissing me good morning, and once I had a cup of coffee in my hand, she proceeded to tell me that she wanted me to meet a new friend.  I didn't need to be an empath to know that she was glowing with happiness and excitement.  

"This is Pax Viridis," she said. "He is the son of our ship's captain."  Then, she said something in her language, presumably introducing me.  The only words I recognized were my name, and Sini's favourite Erisan term of endearment for me; the one that means 'other half of my soul'. 

Pax responded to Sini in Erisan, and then Sini told me, "He says he is pleased to meet you and wants to know if he may have permission to touch you."

"Uh...no," I said.  "I don't want to offend him or anything, but...no."

Sini laughed at that.  "Let him, please.  He will only touch your hands.  I have told him the proper way.  Oh...and your ears.  He would like to touch those."  

"Only if I can touch his ears, too," I said.

We all agreed that was fair, and Pax Viridis experienced his first Earth handshake.  Then, I had my ears thoroughly examined and pronounced strange by this curious boy from another planet.  Pax's ears are pointed like Sini's.  I think he was pleased when Sini told him that I said they were cool.

"Cool," he repeated in English. "Cool, cool, cool!"

Slang may not be the best way to start Pax's education in the English language. 

Sini told me everything she learned from Pax about what he'd been doing since the loss of their ship.  Similar to what happened with Sini's pod,  Pax's pod had landed not too far from a house.  Also like her, he'd been taken in by the owners of the place, but that's where their stories diverge.   While Sini settled in with us and became part of our household, the family Pax had been living with were treating him more like a pet than a person.   They didn't try to teach him English and they didn't really tell him anything about the ways of Earth.  They didn't even make him wear clothes, aside from underpants and a t-shirt, although  apparently he wanted to dress like his human counterparts sometimes, just for fun.   Pax actually seems to like wearing clothes, which Sini says is odd.  Of course, she added the qualifier, "But, he is a child.  Who can understand why he likes what he likes?  Perhaps he will grow out of it."    I hope not.

As time went on and Pax got closer to being a man instead of a boy, he started to sense that he wasn't the only Erisan on Earth.   He became more and more certain that there was someone else, so one night he sneaked out of the house and set off to look for her.   It took him about a month to find his way to Sapphire's house.  He'd been more or less living on the street from the time he left his old place until he arrived here.  He'd been trying to stay out of sight of humans as much as possible, which meant he slept during the day and travelled at night.

Judging by what Sini gathered from Pax's tale, he'd been relatively close to us the whole time.  The place where he landed was about a hundred kilometers from here, and while that's a horrible distance for a young boy to walk, it'd only be an hour-long car trip.  He could've landed a thousand kilometers away, or on the other side of the planet, in which case he may never have found us.  If only we'd known how close he'd been, we could have had him with us all along.   He's with us now, though, and that's the most important thing. 

One thing about Pax's story made me curious, and maybe you're wondering about the same thing as I did.   Pax told Sini that he'd started looking for her as soon as he was certain he could sense her.   He could feel her from nearly a hundred kilometers away, so why hadn't she been able to sense him?  Sini said her mental abilities are average and that she can't accurately sense someone unless they're quite near, which is why she wasn't aware of Pax until he was almost here already.  She said she thinks Pax's mental abilities are exceptional, something like the psychic equivalent of having a genius IQ.   His father, the captain of their ship, had awesome mental abilities too, Sini told me.  Her account of Captain Piri Viridis and his legendary psychic skills practically bordered on hero-worship.  I probably would've been amused by the way Sini venerated him, except that it's very likely Captain Piri can't be counted among the living.  That thought pretty much erased any amusement on my part.  

Sini said Pax hasn't mentioned his father at all.  She wants to talk to him about what happened to the ship, but I told her she should wait.   I know she's worried about Pax, but trying to talk to him about his dad or their starship before he's ready might cause a whole lot of problems.   For now, I think the best thing we can do for Pax is to take care of him and teach him everything we can about life on Earth.    I think it's going to be fun.  He's like the little brother I never had.  The little alien brother, but you get the point.

Sapphire discovered that Pax loves having his picture taken.  Here's what he looks like:

 

Catching Up

Apparently, just as Michael and I were heading south, our household grew by two members.   We didn't meet them until we got back, of course, and it's only been a few days, so I don't know them very well yet.   I'll do my best to tell you about them, though.

The first one to arrive was Beau.  His real name is John Beaumont Ransom III, but he prefers to be called Beau.  He's from Georgia.  I think it's kind of ironic that just as Michael and I were leaving for the USA, our new roommate was arriving from there.

Anyway, I heard all about Beau's arrival from Dylan.  He said that he and Rommie had been out for a walk and were on their way back when they noticed somebody on a horse.    Dylan said the person wasn't so much riding the horse as they were simply being carried by it.   The person was all slumped over in the saddle and wrapped in a blanket, he said, and at first he and Rommie couldn't even tell if the person was a guy or a girl.  They managed to lead the horse into our yard, and when they helped the rider down from the saddle, that's when they realized the stranger was a guy.    Dylan said Beau was barely conscious at that point, and he couldn't even tell them his name when they asked.   They took him into the house, and Rommie decided that they should tuck him into bed and try to warm him up.

Since Michael and I were away, no one really knew what to do about Beau's horse.   We're the horse experts around here.   Sini sometimes comes with me and helps me do things at the stable where I board Guardian, so she knows a little bit about taking care of horses.  She was the one who ended up looking after Beau's horse until arrangements could be made the next day for boarding her.   

Beau's horse is called Rebel Yell.  I met her yesterday, and I like her a lot.   She's not as gentle or intuitive as Guardian, but she seems a lot more curious than him.    She must be used to getting lots of treats, because she wasn't shy about sniffing me all over and trying to get at the carrots in my pocket. 

Dylan said Beau was really sick for a while after he first got here, and spent about three days in bed.  I guess he'd been riding through all kinds of weather, so that's not really surprising.   When he finally felt up to talking, he told Rommie and Dylan a little bit about how he ended up here.   He was disowned by his very wealthy parents for reasons that he's apparently not ready to talk about, but which seem to have something to do with his girlfriend, Georgia Lee.    It seems they were running away, but they somehow got separated.  I guess that explains why Georgia Lee didn't arrive here with him. 

From what I can tell, Beau is really shy.  I think it's going to be hard to get to know him.   I'm really curious to know more of his story, but I've got the feeling that it's going to be a long time before he trusts any of us enough to share the details of his life. 

He says he and Rebel are going to stay for a while.    We'll do our best to make them feel at home.

Oh...I almost forgot about Sapphire's photo of Beau and Rebel Yell.   Here it is: